alinator's Journal

Finals
This journal entry goes out to all of you who are dealing with the mundane task of studying for finals. You know who you are. You are all of those people who are now infesting the libraries, walking with your head about two inches from the ground because your backpack is full with every notebook, folder, and textbook you have used this semester. You are the people armed with bags of Skittles and 2 liter bottles of Mountain Dew just so you can make it until 2:30 in the morning. You are those who wake up from a long nap realizing that osmosis doesn't occur from your Chem book to your brain. Instead you find that your insides have gone into your textbook, that being either the drool from your sleep, or your brain which by this point is probably a puddle of goo that leaked out of your head. You are those people who check your e-mail every five minutes praying that someone might have sent you something to distract you from your work. You find that even cleaning your room, dusting, vacuuming, washing dishes, sounds more appealing than sitting with your verb conjugation lists. You are those people who suddenly couldn't care less about your outward appearance. Clod in sweatpants, a t-shirt, and your flip-flops, you head to your favorite study area not really caring if you showered or not. You are the people who are stressed beyond belief, wondering why the heck you put yourself through this. Wouldn't it just be easier to become a hermit and live in the woods forever? You are the people who are so ready to be done, you wish you could just fast forward through this awful week. You are the people who will sit and write and ode to people in your online journal just for the pure distraction from the pile of books sitting right behind you in your awaiting backpack. This journal entry goes out to all of you. Good luck.

The song of the Boomwacker
Why hello all of you journal reading folk. I would like to dedicate this journal entry to my mother, Nancy, a.k.a Bitty Bernie Boomwacker. Now for those of you who don't know, The Fond du Lac Area Children's Chorale is having their spring concert tomorrow evening. This concert will feature my little sister as well as other children from Fond du Lac County. However, the high point of this concert will be by musical members of the community in the boomwacker ensemble. Yes boomwacker. For those of you who have never heard of a boomwacker, it is a long plastic tube that you hit on your leg, head, or hand, and it emits a tone. The tubes are of different length to produce all of the tones of the scale. These tubes are not small like a straw, they are long like a baseball bat, and let's face it, people look ridiculous playing them. However, it was decided that the children's chorale would be singing a song in ode to these magnificent creations, and my mother is a member of the boomwacker choir. Unfortunately, I will not be home to openly mock her for this performance, but rest assured, my dad will be taping it. Good old Nan. I think this could be her true calling. Good luck mom, play your heart out.

Why Hello There
Hello all. Long time no write. Hmmmmm, I can't say things have been that extremely busy, I've just been extremely lazy. I really actually can't think of anything very creative to write. School is school. I really don't feel like learning things out of books anymore. However, I have found that I've learned a few life lessons in the past week or so, so I suppose I shall share them with you all.

1) When you see signs that say 110 miles to Chicago, that means you are heading south, not north.
2) Never drink a bottle of orange juice before a 2 hour car ride. You never know when that car ride could turn into 4 hours with no pit stop in sight.
3) Ducks are like humans in that they only have one mate. (I've gained a new respect for ducks).
4) According to Brittany's theory of life, everything (except for hot dogs) is driven by homeostasis.
5) Never underestimate the entertainment factor of the Eukanuba Tournament of Champions.
6) Don't play an hour of tennis on a pulled groin.
7) Drink plenty of water before a long run so you don't "salt".
8) Formal wear is custom at a dog show.
9) If you have a cold, don't ask Laura to make her belly "talk".
10)Everybody loves a good carnival.
11)Left to their own devices, Schurm and I would become lazy piles living in holes up in Canada.
12)Never leave a chocolate ball in your pocket on a 80 degree day. (I didn't do this one, just witnessed it.)
13)Never eat anything with Surprise in its name.

I hope this was enlightening. Sorry the creativity is a bit lacking. Darn Cold

Current Mood: sick

I'm back
Hey everyone!
I know you missed me. But never fear, my internet is officially working again (thanks to Brent). For those of you who did not know the reason of my absence, I'd like to tell you a little bit about a lovely thing called ResNet. Yes ResNet. They like to take my computer and say to it, "Wow, you are large, old, and clunky. So as if you weren't obnoxious enough due to the fact that you take up Ally's entire desk, let's make you worse by taking away your internet capabilities." Though my computer is old, it puts up a good fight, trying to keep up with the scheming minds of the ResNet underworld. Unfortunatly for the fourth time this year, the battle was just to difficult, and my good old Gateway was forced to put up a white flag in surrender. I was quarantined. Blocked from the online world a week and a half before spring break. After running about 3.89 billion virus scans, I came to the definite conclusion that there were no more viruses on my computer. However, the ResNet cult did not agree. "No," they said, "We shall not unquarantine you, for that would make your life easier. Mwah ha ha." So, I was without internet until this very day, the day I am finally updating my journal. Now there is one more fact that I would like to point out. I called the Do-It service (the computer folk here at Madison), and they said to me that I would have to bring in my computer in order to have a full virus cleaning. I must further point out that the Do-It store is completely across campus from where I live, and my computer weighs about 8.5 tons. So, I really didn't want to take that route. Then a light shone upon me, and I heard a mystic voice. Actually it was Brent, and he was like "Hey I'll look at your computer." So he did, and guess what? THERE WAS NO STINKIN' VIRUS! My computer had kept a record of my virus though it was not truly there. But Brent got the better of it, and beat that thing to death. Ha ha ResNet! You can't defeat us! We shall prevail. Huzzah for the Green Knight! (Sorry, a bit of California nostalgia.) Anyways, that's my story. It's good to be back.

Hmmmm, tis been awhile
I guess March 9th must be my lucky day. No it's not, the 10th is your lucky day. The 10th? It's 12:04 already. It's morning. And what a beautiful morning!

Sorry, for those of you who aren't "Singing in the Rain" fanatics, that was my own little rendition. So, it's been awhile since I've last updated my journal. What has happened since the last entry? Well, I've had some tests, got a virus on my computer, rode my pet emu to Guam, learned a Turkish jig, took 4th place in a talent show (shout out to the Happy Hands Club performers), joined a shuffle board team, shaved my head, enjoyed my first Gille cookie of the season, found my lost earring, saw Einstein with squeaky shoes, won a pasta eating contest, and knit myself a dress. Yeah, you could say I've been pretty busy. Oh P.S. this is big news. None other than Nan Jan a.k.a Nance the Pants a.k.a Nanny Goat a.k.a Nanafred a.k.a. my mother is the Fond du Lac Trivia Contest Champion of 2005. That's right folks, my mom is one of Fond du Lac's best. So, if you should by chance see her, give her a pat on the back and exclaim "Well done oh great and wonderful trivia champ!" Yeah, that was big. Also, my grandma won Rubicon's "Stellar Senior" contest for her award winning Tarzan impression, complete with loin cloth and jungle vines. Actually that didn't happen, but hey, it'd be pretty funny. Well, I suppose, time for bed. Good morning all.

Attack of the Squirrels
The other day I was out for a run on State Street and then out around the capitol. I figured it was a normal run, just like any other day. I rounded the corner by the white dome and headed along the front side, opposite of State Street. That's where I spotted them, the squirrels. Now let me just explain to you that it wasn't just a few squirrels climbing in the trees. No, there were atleast fifteen (and I'm being totally serious) scattered about the lawn. Some were in groups of two or three, some seemed to be standing guard upon the tree trunks. Regardless of where they were standing, it was very apparent that they were plotting. My first thoughts were those of paranoia. What if I had done something to upset the squirrel population of Madison? What if I had somehow offended them thereby causing them to revolt against me? I quickly pushed all such thoughts from my mind and tried to determine why such a meeting would take place. Then it all seemed so clear, cheese curds. Yes, cheese curds was the answer. Everyone knows that Wisconsin is known for its deep-fried cheese curds. Dripping in greasy goodness, they are a staple to us high-cholesteroled dairy consumers. However, everyone also knows that after eating so many cheese curds, you begin to sense the presence of nausea. So, what do people do? They feed their remaining cheese curds to the squirrels. Not a good idea. It is a little known fact that deep fried foods give squirrels bad indigestion. Therefore cheese curds plus squirrels equals viscious squirrel uprising. I am warning you now, squirrels may appear to be cute, furry little woodland creatures. Don't be deceived. Behind those beady little eyes are the plotting minds prepared to attack at any moment.

Current Mood: good

The Automatic Paradox
Automatics. Some may claim they make our lives easier, others may beg to differ. For example, the automatic door. It comes in very handy when you are carrying your pet llama home from the grocery store and, there's not way that you can reach out and grab the handle. On the other hand, have you ever experienced that momentary terror when you're just not quite sure if that door's actually going to open? Or what about those fully automatic bathrooms? Now I will admit, the paper towel dispensers that shoot out that scratchy, non-absorbant, hand drying sheet, put me in a state of giddiness. Admit it, you've had the urge to do karate chops in front of those things just to make the paper towel come out. Automatic soap dispensers are fun too. For the most part, they dispel just the right amount of soap. Plus, they match so well with the automatic faucets. I know we've all experienced those obnoxious sinks where you have to push down on the knob and then quick try to get your hands under some water. Of course you never do, and then you have to restort to trying to stretch your leg in an awkward position just so you can get your foot up there to hold the water down so you don't spread disease causing bacteria. However, as grand as automatics are, I reach my paradox at the automatic flush toilet. Now it seems to me that the toilets never flush at the right time. You move just a little bit and it flushes. Heck you walk in the stall and it flushes. Sometimes, if you just stand there in just the right position it continues to flush over and over and over. Now I ask you, is this environmentally friendly? All that flushing, all that water. Plus, you have the unpleasant experience of being sprayed by it's Old Faithful like effects. So, the automatics, vital to today's society? or menacing to our very existance?

Current Mood: tired

PE 100
Yo what up dawgs? Today has consisted of lots and lots of studying. Studying for a little class I like to call PE Active 100. Now by the name many of you may be making the assumption that this is just an easy gym class. Well, it's not. It's gym in lecture form twice a week. This equals no fun. So as I study for my midterm, I wonder, why the heck do I need to know how my sweat concentration increases when it's hot out? I mean if we actually learned useful information, like what to do if your Great Aunta Rosa lacerates her liver, that would be a different story. Let's face it, the basics are sufficient. Eat right, exercise, don't throw yourself off of a cliff into a pool of hungry, hungry, hippos and you'll be fine. End of discussion. No need to know that ATP is produced in the Mitochondria, no need to know that flexibility in the quads may prevent development of Indonesian Sloth. Ah well. I must get back to my studies. Good night to you all.

Current Mood: irritated

Starbucks Friend
Hello everyone. So, you know how when you're in the routine of day to day living, and you kind of have your regulars. You know, those people that you always seem to run into. You don't really know them, but some how, there's this mutual understanding between the two of you. This is the case with Krissy and Starbucks friend. One day when she was at Starbucks, he chose to share a table with her due to the hustle and bustle of the crowded coffee shop. Since then, Starbucks friend (as she fondly calls him) has appeared on countless occasions. Is this mere coincidence? or is it fate? Sara and I have decided that despite Krissy's relationship with Dave, Starbucks friend may be a secret rendez-vous. Either that or he's a member of the Bohemian mob whose main goal it to put an end to the emu protests of which Krissy is head chair person. Another interesting piece of information is that Starbucks kid was seen just out side Krissy's dorm building "talking" on his cell phone. Is he plotting? Krissy seems to believe that he has a girlfriend who lives there which would dash all hopes of Sara, Krissy, and I triple dating him. I on the other hand believe it's all part of his devious plot. The moral of this story, you can't be to careful in trusting table sharers at Starbucks. Or maybe it's that you should never eat raisins before going on a roller coaster. Either one.

Thrifting!
"I live for thrifting!" Those are the words of none other than the great thrifter herself. Brittany Seabloom. Today she was my master, and I her apprentice as we forged our way to the land of Dig and Save. "Young grasshopper," she said to me, "the first rule of thrifting is that you must work for your finds." And work we did. The training began as we were picked up by the Badger Cabs. I reluctantly crawled into the back seat, torn from use, enduring the painful stench of who knows what. Brittany ducked her head as chunks of the ceiling draped over her shoulder. We sat uncomfortably in the back seat awaiting the approach of Park Street. Much to our surprise, the driver pulled onto a side street along Bascom with a package in hand. "I'll be right back," he said, and got out of the car. Brittany and I looked at eachother in disbelief. We sat there for a good 5 minutes while signals over the radio came in loud and clear. Most likely there is some conspiracy going on in the cab company, surely having something to do with the production of Llama coats in Indonesia. Anyways, he finally returned, and our trek continued. After driving down the long stretch of Park Street, we reached our destination. "I think we're going to need a cart," Brittany declared with such authority. I was amazed at her great skill. Now for those of you who don't know what Dig and Save is, it's like Good Will only everything is just thrown into large refridgerator boxes, and you dig through them in search of a good find. Then the clothes you want are weighed, and cost $1 per pound. Brittany and I headed to the back of the store and began our search. Box after box, we dug with great vigor. Brittany and I found a few glorious t-shirts, and I came upon a 1986 Sturgus jacket. Then came the real test. Finding bed sheets to make into our dresses for the Blackhawk dance. This was no easy task mind you, but after great deliberation, we made our purchases. Ready to head back, we realized that the bus was not coming for another half an hour. Continuing on in our adventure, we walked for what seemed an eternity to Copp's to purchase some junk food. This included Skittles and Starburst Jelly Beans (my personal favorite). Then, under the weight of our bags, we trudged to the bus stop, awaiting the 53. After about 10 minutes, we saw it, looming in it's glory on the horizon. Then we watched as it drove right past us. Dang it. Limited stops. So we later boarded the 47, got off at the wrong stop, and sprinted to catch the 80 to get us back to the dorms. We finally made it, with our $3 worth of stuff, candy to rot our teeth, and fatigue to last for the night. However, I took with me something of much greater worth. I, Ally Schult, was able to train under the greatest thrifter there is. Life is as it should be.

Current Mood: tired

Huzah for Knitting
Guten Tag! Wow, I've just been feeling the need to speak German in honor of Frau Bryant. Woo, now that I got that out of my system. Tonight was a girl's night to end all girl's nights. First Sara, Krissy, and I went to Lower Franks where we ate some yummy cookies made by none other than the Betty Crocker. She is quite the baker, let me tell you. But cookies are not enough for girls on a mission to have a girls night, so what better than a big honkin' dish of ice cream. Now for you normal people, a big dish of ice cream takes at least 15 minutes to polish off. Not for this animal. I was done with that baby in 13.8 seconds flat. Yup, it was good. Then of course a few more cookies followed. Can we say acne break out? Now you may be thinking, ok you ate some sweets, big deal. Well, all of this was accompanied by the greatest, non-80 year old woman like activity there is. Yes, knitting. The three of us sat at our table and knitted away, making the only things we truely know how to make, scarves. I have now determined that by the time I am 25 years old, I will have enough scarves to warm the entire student body. Next, we rented a chick flick, 16 Candles, and headed to Krissy's dorm. Now before we watched it I must interject this fact. In the stalls in the Tripp dorms there is a sign. A sign that gives instructions of great importance. "Please wipe all bodily fluids off of toilet and floor." Hmmmmmm, delicious. So we watched the movie (while knitting of course) and ate popcorn. The movie was, well more random than my grandma's pet cat Lisa dancing around in a sombrero singing the Jackson Five's greatest hits. After a bit more work on our knitting, we called it a night. By the way, would anyone have any idea how one would go about knitting a dress? It can't be too hard, I've decided. Just a lot of scarves put together. Ahh well. Tis time for sleep. And don't forget, when your pet squirrel gets the mumps, dip him in yogurt. Good night!

Current Mood: chipper
Current Music: Broken

Rally
Hello all. I'm sorry I have been so long in writing. I had no idea people actually anticipated the next entry. So, for all of my avid fans, here it is. Today, as brisk as it was outside, I decided that I would go for a run. Braving the icy sidewalks and bone chilling winds, I layered up, took my mp3 player in hand, and headed out the door. I thought it would most likely be an uneventful run, as most are, but I was greatly mistaken. I never in my life would have anticipated the danger of the ice. People around me were dropping like flies as their feet were swept from beneath them. Now I don't know if you all face the same conundrum (is that how you spell it? I don't know, but it's a big word) as I do, but I feel torn as to whether or not I should help the person or mercilessly laugh at how clumsy they are. Being the kind and compassionate person that I am, I usually opt for the later. However, not long after that I usually find myself in the same position. Anyways, back to my run. So after sliding down the hills of Madison's academic area, I finally reached State Street. A place that is full of commotion, yet not full of hills, which also makes me happy due to the fact that I was beginning to feel like I was going to die due to lack of air. I weaved in and out of the crowds nearly crashing into a lady with a big furry purse. Now I ask you, is there really a need for a big furry purse that envelops half of the sidewalk? I think not. Soon I found myself nearing the capital. My mp3 player had just reached the Parent Trap soundtrack, when suddenly my battery died. Now I didn't think much of it. However, it may have been a truely ominous sign. As I looked up I saw a mob of angry protesters surrounding the capitol. Curious as to their cause, I went closer. I walked up to an old man dressed as Luke Skywalker. I thought it was a bit odd, but hey it's Madison. I said to him, "Hey what's going on here?" He looked at me funny and said, "How can you not know? Governor Doyle has just planned his new budget, and it doesn't include money for the 'After School Learn to Find the Force' program. The nerve." I laughed, I mean come on for real. Bad idea. No sooner had the chortle left my mouth when the group in front of me turned their evil gazes upon me. "How dare you scoff when the dark force is so near?" Before I knew what was happening, an angry mob of Hans Solo look-a-likes began chasing me with their light sabers. I ran for it. Unfortunatly, my legs were still a bit sore from the broomball tournament I played in this weekend, so my efforts were in vain. Soon what seemed like every Star Wars fan and Treky alike were after me. Finally, they cornered me in the alley behind Potbelly's. "Take back your snicker or we shall brand you with the sign of the vulcan!" they cried. Slowly, and with great hesitance, I lifted my hand making the v with my fingers. "Please have mercy!" I cried. Astonished that I would know their ways, the crowd slowly dispursed, leaving me in a crumpled heap. I got up, grabbed a sub sandwich and ran home. Hmmmm. Weird.

Current Mood: strugglin'

The Haunted Horse and Buggy
Good evening my dear friends. Tonight, the strangest of occurences well occured upon the lakeshore path. I was braving the dark and frightful journey back to my dorm with my dear friends Sara, Drew, and Mari. Now we knew going into it that the lakeshore path is full of mystery and danger, but we decided that together we would brave the uncertain together. Suddenly as we were walking we saw a bright light in the distance. Mari gasped as she cried out, "It's a zamboni!" For a moment we were all silent in horror. A zamboni on the lakeshore path? Than to our astonishment we realized that it wasn't a zamboni at all, but a horse drawn carriage. It was old fashioned and looked like it came out of "A Tale of Two Cities." As it approached we could smell the stench of the wild stallion pulling this coach. We were all too frightened to speak as we huddled behind Drew for protection. He was the first to attempt communication. "Hello horse!" he said. Surprisingly, the horse didn't respond, but the shadow of the dark carriage slowly passed us by. We couldn't see who resided inside, but somehow we knew that it must have been some sort of ghost. When it was finally behind us, well we all burst out laughing cause it was probably the most random thing I have seen in a long time. Mari ended it with, "He guys you might want to walk on the outside of the path. Who knows what's along the middle."

Current Mood: sleepy

Note to Self
Note to self: Never eat more than 200 Skittles in the span of an hour. A: it makes you feel like an oversized great blue whale, B: it rots out your teeth, and C: you have a sugar buzz for the next 8 weeks. However there are pro's to "tasting the rainbow" as they say. A: Brittany can make really cool sculptures out of melted Skittles, B: Skittles melted into wax makes a really cool candle, C: my grandma gundrum can feed them to her 200 cats, D: Aardvark is a really fun word to say (and I learned how to spell it from Arthur: A-a-r-d-v-a-r-k), and E: Skittles just taste good. So next time Uncle Louis has a polka party, put on your clogs and lieder hosen (sorry German students if I botched that one), grab some skittles, and dance the night away with your Great Aunt Edna (even though she wears bright orange old lady lipstick and smells like stale trout). Well, tis time to go to sleep my dears. I hope you all dream of Punjab (for those of you who don't know, he's from Annie. "We got Punjab") and don't forget to feed your lizard. In the words of Kip, "Peace out"

Current Mood: drained

The World of Good Old HW
Today I shuffled my feet into yet another Chemistry lecture. Class three of five for today. I spotted my friends and took my seat in those uncomfortable wooden chairs with desks that smash your legs until you lose feeling in your toes. Anyways, as I prepared my notebook for notes that I most likely wouldn't understand 5 minutes after class was over, I saw Howard W. walk in, looking stunning as usual, today in his bright red suspenders. I think the finishing touch was his hair, sticking straight up in the air due to the contemplative scratching of his head. Oh Howard. He started off lecture explaining that just because he has a sense of humor, doesn't mean that we can blow off the class. Then he told us a joke. Here it is. "A lion family goes out to dinner. The baby lion says, 'Can I have a calf?'" Yup, that was it. Can anyone find the punch line? If you can, could you let me know? Cause I'm pretty sure there isn't one. Then Howard taught us about PBB which used to be an anti-flammatory chemical. So HW told us that when we have kids if we dress them in fluffy "jam jams" they will be safe if we ever light up a joint right next to them. Hmmmmm Howard. I wonder about your child rearing skills. Tis the lessons of life that you learn in Chem 104. I think I'd rather be learning to train emu's to do the hula, but you can't get everything you want in life. Good night all.

Current Mood: drained

The Gift of Procrastination
Well hello there! Today I had one class. Yes one. So, you would think that with one class, I would get lots of things done. Hmmmmm. You'd think that wouldn't you. I thought I did a decent amount of work, yet now at 11:00 I find myself with far too much to do. So I think to myself, did I really work hard today? Or perhaps were there events that occured that I was unaware of the occupied my time? Maybe instead of studying my Chemistry I was off racing dolphins in Lake Mendota. No, that can't be, I'm afraid of fish. (I know I know dolphins are mammals. Same difference. Heck there was a kid in my 5th grade class who was convinced he was a reptile, so who really cares anyways) Sorry I digress. So if I wasn't racing dolphins, perhaps I was pealing corn with my Great Uncle Louis in the fields of Oklahoma. Nope, that can't be it either. Uncle Louis is on his month long bus tour with the "I Love Lucy" look-a-likes. No you weirdo's, he's not dressed as Lucy. That'd just be wrong. He's dressed as Ethel. Ok, so no dolphins, no Louis. I've got it, I must have been taking Dutch dancing lessons. Nope, couldn't be that either. I don't have those dainty little wooden shoes. (Any Shirley Temple fans out there? If so, you know she's the only one who can really pull those things off.) Well, no dolphins, no Louis, no Dutch dancing. That leaves only one option. I must have been subconciously training to be a master grandma ninja. Yes that's it. Secretly it is my true passion. I suppose it is no longer a secret because now it is at the fingertips of all those connected to the world wide web. If this is the case, and I am training, hopefully I shall be able to use my skills in the upcoming "Spunky Senior Citizens" Ninja Championships. That'll show everyone. Sure, my pre-lab will be mediocre, my math problems unfinished, and my literary analysis not so analytical. But I shall be the master of my trade. Take that homework! Well, I have to go. I have a Chem quiz tomorrow. Dang it.

Current Mood: weird
Current Music: American Idol's finest!

Oh Randomness!
Good day all! Today was filled with randomness to the most random state of randomness there is. So I thought I would share some of it with all of you. First of all, good old Howard W. Whitlock informed our class that in the south people used to take shoe polish and filter it through bread in order to get the alcohol out of it to drink. Now before anyone goes and tries this, a word of warning. The alcohol in shoe polish is toxic and can make you blind. Makes you want to go down some shoe polish huh? Also, in good old PE 100 we learned that getting too much of your recommended supply of vitamins and minerals can be fatal. So, taking too many supplements is a bad idea. But don't worry, you can't really overdose on vitamins in food alone, unless you eat polar bear liver. Now you may just think that's a random comment from me, but it for sure came out of the mouth of my teacher. Yup yup. So as much as I know you all want to fry up some polar bear liver in a vat of butter and rasberry cordial, I don't recommend it. And to top off my random day, my pet sloth Steve ate my Grandma Sue. It was a sad day for the Schultz's. Grandma Sue made really great cheesy beef potato pie. Oh wait, that was the Pier School cafeteria lady who cut our pizza with a scissors. Delicious! Actually my random day was topped off by a wonderful phone call by none other than Eric-mon Harper with his vocal rendition of "Dumb Dog" and later an instant message that made for some good chuck chuck chucklin'. So in the words of Eric "grab a pokemon and pull up a log, sit down and enjoy...Ally's journal!" Oh and don't forget to feed Uncle Louis. He gets lonely in his hutch in the backyard.

Current Mood: lazy
Current Music: well...none

The Scorpion
The Scorpion. Not a soul on this planet can fully comprehend it's greatness. With a force that can send the strongest of men into a full recoil, it's utter greatness is beyond imagination. Blacker than the darkest night with its neon green accents glowing in glory, the Scorpion is ready to take on any challenge it is faced with. There is no spill too great, no dust bunny to large, and no mess too powerful to conquer the Hercules-like strength of this incredible machine. That's right, the Scorpion is not just a dust buster. It is the king of all cleaning appliances. The world is now a cleaner place.

Long time no type!
Hello All! Wow, I haven't updated this thing in forever. Probably because I was too busy knitting and watching Little Women in my pajamas. But no more of that! I'm back in Madison preparing to start classes tomorrow. I found my classes today and let me tell you, it was colder than an Alaskan turtle sitting in a bucket of crushed (not cubed) ice. But never fear all, according to the news a heat wave is coming! The "milder" air from the west coast is going to create temperatures of 20 degrees! Wahoo bust out your swim suits and flip flops and we can have a pool party. Oh wait everything is encased in ice at the moment. How could I forget? Hmmmmm, what else to update you all on? I can't really think of anything except for the note the Lyle my pet platypus has come down with the mumps. Now I'm not sure if any of you have seen a platypus with the mumps, but let me tell you, it is not a pretty sight. The doctor said just lather him in some apple juice mixed with chopped pecans and that should do the trick. Apple sauce and chopped pecans, who knew? Well folks, I'm tired, so I'm going to go to bed. As they say in Shloshbop, may your moons never set.

Current Mood: sleepy
Current Music: Um... David Letterman

One is the lonliest number...
Well friends, here I am sitting in my room, one final left, one day until I go home, the one person still stuck at school. I've decided that I hate chemistry, I hate it like an armadillo hates being bitten by a venus fly trap. Yeah that's a pretty big hate. Ah well, I shall endure, and then I shall go home and stuff my face with Christmas cookies until I break out in such bad acne that I'll have to wear a potato sack over my head which would really be unfortunate due to the fact that I detest potatoes almost as much as I detest Chemistry. Hmmmm, yet another positively positive journal entry in the life of Ally Schultz. Ah well, tomorrow is a brand new day, and after my exam I know that I shall be in the highest of spirits. Speaking of spirits, it seems that some folk have decided to spend some time with good ole Jack Daniels this evening. As I am typing this, I just heard a guy refer to himself as Moonbeam. The good thing is most of these folks have exams at 7:45 tomorrow morning. I on the other hand am going to tuck myself into my unmaid bed (I don't think I've made it since I got back from Thanksgiving) at approximatly 10:30 where I will most likely lie awake for the next two hours. Then I shall frolic off to Franks to eat some breakfast, take my exam, hug my mom, pack up the car, go shopping, pick up my sister, make rice krispie wreaths, and watch White Christmas. In the words of the Green Knight, "Huzah!" Well everyone, that's it for tonight. I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas Eve Eve tomorrow, and I shall see you all soon. And remember, when your emu begins to salivate that just means that he's eaten too much chicken fantastic. Good night all.

Current Mood: anxious

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